Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
