Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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