hotel room ftw
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Randomize
