yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
