that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
MIDGETS
????
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
