Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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