no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize