I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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