we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Randomize
