Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
don't judge my taste in strippers
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
