You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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