so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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