i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I just want nice things and good sex
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
