She tied me up with her honor cords...
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
