yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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