He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
