They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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