I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
