I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Randomize
