Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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