She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize