Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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