She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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