it was like eating out sand paper
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
This is the high leading the old right now
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Randomize