Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Randomize
