Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
He has the fingertips of a God
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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