I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
