she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
It's blow job season.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
