trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I need moral support for this bender
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
