Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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