The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
