She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
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