i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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