More tranny stories later!
i barfeds in our rink
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
