Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
