You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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