I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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