there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
