They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
