You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
she was so not down for the gang bang
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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