i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
