I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
