I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
