so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
