....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
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