i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
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