I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
