WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Randomize
