Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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