i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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