The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
i think my cat just said my name.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
