but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
